Ugh - here we go again!

Yesterday, I missed my celiac post. Guess why?

Nope. No alien invasion.

Nope. No sick kids.

Nope. No good TV.

YES! Because I am dumb. I got glutinized. (whee) Back when I first was diagnosed, I was afraid to eat ANYTHING I didn't make myself. Even then, sometimes, I wasn't too sure. As I've come along these 9 months, I've become braver and started eating out again. Turns out that a dish I thought I had verified as safe is really not safe.

Wednesday night, I ate one of my favorites from the local Chinese place. It was SO good that I had two servings. I got a full 8 hours sleep, but woke exhausted the next AM. Weird, but whatever, right? I took the rest of the Chinese with me for lunch. After dinner, I crashed. I completely missed the rest of Thursday night. I slept, and slept, and slept. I slept so hard that I missed Jim leaving, coming home, leaving again, coming home again, working on video editing, Annie running a remote control toy, Jimmy coming in and out of the room.... I was asleep, face down in a pillow. According to Jim, he's never seen anyone actually sleep face down before.

I woke up long enough to watch a movie with Jim, and then went to bed. I woke up today feeling logy and I couldn't concentrate and I had trouble following complicated thoughts (aka brain fog) and my face was red and itchy and my insides ache and I'm having an acne breakout.

Ugh.

...and I was so happy that I didn't have a breakout this month, too.

Ugh.

Obligations

Looking for a support group in your health and/or weight loss endeavors? Come join us at One Weigh at a Time!

This week: 174.4#
Change: Down .6#

Thought of the week: It's not about the pounds off, but the good stuff coming in.

I like to find stuff

Way back, once upon a time, I worked for Dunder Mifflin Infinity. I was part of the Beaumont, TX branch.

One of the features was message boards: games, contests, general chats, stuff about The Office, stuff about random stuff... The one that surprised me was all about random things that you find on the floor: notes, lists, pictures, anything that's readable, basically, is fair game. Now, I had never heard of anyone else picking up those things and saving them.

Yes, I said "anyone else". Because, my friends, that is EXACTLY what I do. Everywhere I go, I have one eye out for stuff that people have dropped. Then I pick it up, and if it's interesting and not just some wrapper or receipt, I keep it. Think of it as people watching taken to the next (non-creepy) level.

Do you do this too? What have you found?

My latest find comes from Senior Slave day at the school where I teach. It is a student's typed instructions to her new Senior, freshly purchased for a day's "labor". The name has been changed for courtesy's sake. Everything else has been faithfully recreated, spelling, caps, punctuation, text size, and all.

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Rachel's To DO List

• RACHEL YOU ARE TO carry all my books.
• Write all my notes for class
• When I am entering a classroom you need to say The Beautiful, Lovely, and Wonderful Techira is coming!
• When I need to ask a question I will write it down then you will say: Techira needs to ask a question. And then proceed to ask the question
• Before I sit down you will wipe all seats.
• You also need to pass out my valentines' day grams to whoever I point to and say: Techira Smith has chosen to give you a valntine candy enjoy and love her forever
• Whenever someone says my name you have to say Queen Techira someone is calling you
• The number one rule is HAVE FUN

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This is just a sample of the insanity that makes up Senior Slave day. One of my other students had to put on geisha makeup and a kimono and carry a small paper fan. He - yes HE - also had to shriek in fear whenever the bell rang, and scream, "The Huns are coming!"

I love my job.

Oh, my -- It all makes so much sense now.

I was reading one of the gluten-free blogs I follow: Gluten Free Homemaker. Linda wrote a post called "How Gluten Affects Me Mentally," and I swear it gave me chills because it reminded me SO much of problems I have had. (and sometimes still have! maybe I'm still getting gluten, even though I don't think I am?!?)

The part that got me the most was this:

"When gluten is carried by the blood to the brain, it causes problems. Dr. Fasano explained that the gluten molecule is similar to endorphins which, along with other things, give us a sense of well-being. The gluten molecules will dock where endorphins are supposed to dock. In effect, the gluten blocks endorphins and the positive feelings they can give us."

Translation: Gluten leaking into your system can turn you into an angry, moody, unhappy beast! Whoa. No wonder I felt so out of control.

Noblesse Oblige Award

In American English especially, the term noblesse oblige has also been applied more broadly to those who are capable of simple acts to help another, usually one who is less fortunate.
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Why is it that whenever my mom - Clara of Coming Back to Life - sends me an award, I am off my game and undeserving?

Ok, Ok, this is only the second award she's given me. The first was the Lemonade Award: an award for being a positive person. She sent it to me on a day that I was totally sucking lemons instead of making lemonade.


The circumstances around this Noblesse Oblige award is no different. Check out what she wrote about me:

Lynne nominated 3 blogs for this award. I don't know if there is a required number or not. I'm only going to nominate one blog. She doesn't usually participate in memes and awards so she may not post that she has received it. But she certainly deserves it and I hope you'll go read her blog. She is Mikki at Here's What Let's Do. Mikki has Celiac Disease and much of her blog is devoted to helping others who have this problem find ways of coping with it. She also tells funny or serious stories of her life as wife, mother, and teacher.

But when she left me a comment, saying she'd understand if I didn't follow up and post the award, what did I do? I was happy that she'd relieved me of the commitment. Sure, I thought, I'll get around to it eventually (11 days later now), but I went to her page anyway and skimmed the post. Oh, nifty, I thought.

But I didn't READ the post. I didn't realize I was the ONLY winner. I was so self-centered that day, thinking about MY life, MY commitments, MY work problems... ME ME ME ME ME.

Why is it that we snub those we love? When I read the post again today - really read it this time - I realized that I have done my family a disservice. I have said, "Yeah, whatever," to my Mom when she did a nice thing for me. What kind words she poured out for me. What pride I see in those lines. And there I was, ignoring her attention.

I'm honored to have been chosen to receive this award. It represents a type of person that I DO strive to be.

Like the aid worker who travels the globe, but does nothing at home; like the Christian who is religious on a Sunday, but hateful at home; like the benefactor who supports children from overseas, but does not give to local foundations, I was so busy with being helpful, that I risked being harmful.

I hope, Mom, that you do not mind the 11 days of silence, because I AM grateful for the award, and touched that you would choose me to be the sole recipient. I am glad that you think that I am deserving of it.

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The conditions for receiving the award:

1. The Blogger manifests exemplary attitude, respecting the nuances that pervade different cultures and beliefs.
2. The Blog contents inspire, strive to encourage, and offer solutions.
3. There is a clear purpose at the Blog, one that fosters a better understanding of Social, Political, or Economic Views; the Arts, Culture, Sciences, or Beliefs.
4. The Blog is refreshing and creative.
5. The Blogger promotes friendship and positive thinking.

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Here's the fun part: choosing who to send the award to next. I have decided to pass this award along to Beth of A Real Anti-Supermom. Her posts remind me so much of when my kids were little, and she keeps such a pleasant tone to her writing. I think that she deserves the award because she

• definitely promotes positive thinking - "Don't Cry Over Spilt Milk"
• displays a realistic view of our blogging culture and society - "Love-Hate Relationship"
• takes a creative approach to all her posts, even incorporating great art - "Hot Mom"

(hehee - that last one I just really liked! I had to get it in there somewhere!)

So, go visit Beth! Check out her lovely, realistic, it's-ok-to-be-a-normal-mom-and-person-and-have-a-great-time-doing-it-oh-and-also-laugh-at-yourself-along-the-way blog. Oh, and Beth... Thanks. Your blog is the awesome.

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Here are the rules:

1. Create a Post with a mention and link to the person who presented the Noblesse Oblige Award.
2. The Award Conditions must be displayed at the Post.
3. Write a short article about what the Blog has thus far achieved – preferably citing one or more older Post to support.
4. The Blogger must present the Noblesse Oblige Award in concurrence with the Award conditions.
5. The Blogger must display the Award at any location at the Blog.

Check your advertising demographics, please.

Dear Sport Court, Incorporated -

While cruising my Facebook profile - posting snarky comments on my friends' status updates, sending flair, harvesting crops on my virtual farm, and generally wasting time - your ad on the side caught my eye.

Now, as far as I've been able to tell, the Facebook ads are fairly controlled. They're matched to me, my profile, sometimes my friends, or our interests. That's fine! I've seen some interesting ads and visited some nifty websites.

How the heck did your ad end up on my Facebook?

"Bring the Game Home," reads your slogan.

"Ok," I think. "Why not?" So I click on the link, expecting to find a sporting goods website - bats, balls, hoops, nets, HOLY GOODNESS!!!!!

The page opens...

"Ooooooooooh."

You sell courts: backyard sports courts: basketball, volleyball, badminton, soccer, putting greens, batting cages, any combination of beautiful goodness I could possible imagine!

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" I think. "This MUST be a mistake - this must be a corporate site." But, no, this is a site for me - homeowner with yard.

Screech to a halt, please, Sport Court! How in the world did I end up in your demographic?! Just because I live in an expensive area doesn't mean I'm rich! Just because I own a house+yard combo doesn't mean I can afford your courts or have a place to put one! Just because I was talking with my husband about putting in a basketball hoop doesn't mean I...

Have you been spying on me?

I'm suspiciously eyeing that random unidentifiable hole in the back wall of my closet ... is that where you're hiding?

How did you know? Have you been hanging out with the Ministry of Privacy?

hmmmmmmm...

I remain, suspiciously yours,
- Mikki


PS. Perhaps you didn't hear? Most of us don't have money.

My Celiac Journey -- Part IV -- Changes

Just beginning the series? Here’s what you’ve missed.

Part I -- The Diet Contest

Part II -- “You look allergic.”

Part III -- It was Thursday.

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Thanks for being understanding about my taking a break last week. I hope you’re enjoying my story. This episode picks up where Part III left off: I had just received my diagnosis after a series of Thursday appointments with my doctor. In the face of the unknown, my husband was comforting and encouraging. I was scared.

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From fear to uncertainty.

Once the initial trauma of a confirmed diagnosis passed, I had to face the fact that I really had no idea what to do to deal with my new requirements in life.

Celiac disease (if you don’t know already) is an autoimmune disorder. People with celiac are gluten intolerant. If we ingest anything made with wheat, rye, barley, or one of its derivatives, our bodies react by attacking the gluten. This attack occurs in the digestive system - the small intestine to be exact. For more info, visit the National Institutes of Health’s Celiac Awareness page.

I had to start my very own awareness campaign, reading web pages, books (thanks to my mom-in-law!), recipes, a listserve, blogs… anything and everything I could get my hands on. I had never heard of Celiac, much less met anyone else with it. I had no one to turn to, no one who had been there. I forged my own way through information towards knowledge.

(Need info? Email me! I’ll send you whatever you need.)

From uncertainty to training

I tried to approach this new phase of my life much like I approached being an athlete when in high school. I set aside time every day to work on this problem. I adjusted what I ate immediately, focusing on pure, whole, simple foods. I made it a priority, and strove to become the best -- the best cook, baker, shopper, experimenter, and researcher.

One of the first things I did was purge and sort my pantry. I gave away much of what I could no longer eat. Jim voluntarily gave up much of his gluten-filled foods to help me through the transition. It helped so much to have it almost completely out of the house for a while. For my favorite items, I went to the websites and looked them up. They were sorted into keep and don’t keep piles.

The first time that I went to the grocery store, my shopping time more than doubled: from one hour to about two and a half. I armed myself with lists of acceptable, questionable, and forbidden ingredients and additives. I took my kids with me for moral support. I took my cell phone. I took a cart full of patience.

Produce section: EASY! Woohoo!

Gluten free shelves! Hooray!

Gluten free macandcheese?!? AWESOME! ($4.25 a serving?!? SO WORTH IT.)

Dressings, marinades, and sauces. Oh, crap. From that spot forward, until I got to meats and dairy at the end, I was in super-slow crawl mode.

Many items I could quickly decide yes or no. All of the rest of the items I called the 800 number on the packaging. I asked for verification of gluten or no gluten. The customer service people -- ALL OF THEM -- were super helpful and most of them took my email address and sent full gf product lists to me.

That last paragraph doesn’t really capture the drudgery of this first trip. So many of my absolute favorite items went back on the shelf. So, so many. By the third aisle, I was in tears. Often, this scene was played:

One of the kids would bring me an item.
I would read the label while they stood in front of me, their little eyes fixed on my face, waiting.
Sometimes the wheat or barley was clearly labeled, sometimes I double checked my lists.
Then once of them would ask, “Well?” so hopefully.
My throat would close up, I would shake my head.
“Put it back,” I would whisper. “Put it back.”

Read, sort, repeat

Read, sort, repeat

Read, sort, repeat

From training to toddling

It wasn’t long - a week, maybe two - before I felt more in control. I started cooking with more confidence, ruined fewer dishes, started finding a little variety in my meals.

It WAS long before I was willing to try any sort of processed food, junk food, multiple-ingredient food, or mixed beverages. I was a purist for a long, long time.

It was hard, but it tasted good.

I felt good.

I looked good.

My skin was good.

My hair was shiny.

The shadows under my eyes faded.

The swelling in my gut disappeared.

I cheated once: when Little Ceasar’s pizza opened nearby. It was NOT worth it. I haven’t cheated since. It doesn’t matter how good something tastes: if it’s going to rip apart your digestive system, it’s NOT worth it.

Once I was comfortable with maintaining my new lifestyle, it was time to change again: from toddling to running. It was time to start experimenting. Oh, yes. Time indeed.